A few years ago, my good friend MN excitedly Google Chatted me. "Grace!" she exclaimed. "Do I want to be Miss N or Ms. N?" I immediately responded, "I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS ABOUT MS."
Allow me to explain.
How do you formally introduce a man, or what do you call him if he's your teacher? The default is Mr. Fill-In-The-Blank. The only other really likely one in academic settings is Dr. Whatever, or Professor So-And-So at the collegiate level. What about women? Well, if she's married, it's probably Mrs., but maybe not, and if she's single, then it's definitely Miss, or is it? And again, maybe she has a doctoral degree, which throws a whole new wrench into matters. Horrible mess.
Now, a quick disclaimer: these are my personal views. When couples join together, they modify their names for any number of reasons. I know families who:
* both took a new name which held significance for them as individuals and as a couple
* both took both names as a hyphenate
* each kept their name
* both had hyphenated last names, and each took one half of their hyphenate to create a new hyphenate
* combined their last names to make a new one
* both took on the name of one partner
None of these is wrong, and none is The Right Way To Do Things. What I hate is the assumption that a woman should take her husband's name upon marriage. (Really I hate when anyone tells women they should do anything, but that's another matter entirely.) My mother kept her name when she married, and my father jokes that she let him keep his name, too. But as a young woman in the 1980s, my mother came across so many women who were truly confused by her choice to remain Ms. B instead of Mrs. H. "But I'm proud of my husband," they would say to her. Sure, she was proud of hers too. But why was the expectation that she would take his name to "prove" that?
So back to Ms. The moniker was introduced as a neutral term that did not imply a woman's marital status at all, just like Mr. for men. Why should a woman's identity be so altered by a marriage certificate, but not a man's? I remember around the age of nine telling my mother that I was never changing my name. I wavered on this for a while during a serious relationship I was in a few years ago, but am back to being fairly certain that I do not want to change my name when and if I wed. I have been Grace H for my entire life and I absolutely love my last name - why should I change who I am for someone else? I would consider combining names, hyphenating, or something of that ilk, but only if my partner and I were both going to make that change. (Again - these are MY personal feelings about MY name, and every individual and couple has to discuss and decide for themselves. There is no Right Way or Wrong Way.)
With my particular population of primary ELL students, are they going to realize the weight of my choice to be Ms. H rather than Miss H? Probably not. (Many don't even recognize the different between Ms. and Miss anyway!) Some of my colleagues might. I always refer to colleagues as Ms. unless asked to do otherwise. But for me, I own it as my personal choice. I am Ms. H, and I define my own identity.
(Special thanks to my career mentor, DS, for inspiring this post - this is largely based upon a conversation he initiated during a professional development lunch in the summer of 2012. See also this NYT article on Ms.)
**********
Currently reading: just finished Chains by Laurie Halse Anderson
Current high: halfway to our first vacation!
Current low: just a melancholy evening
Tuesday, August 26, 2014
Saturday, August 23, 2014
Name Games Are NOT For The Teacher
For my first week of drama classes, as my daily game for each grade level, I chose an appropriate drama-oriented name game. Each new class I learned ways to make my instructions a little better and a little faster and a little tighter. But did they help me learn ANY names? Not really. I was too focused on classroom management, supporting students who were nervous or shy, and keeping the lesson going. For the grade levels with which I am working, where there are many new
students, I do not regret playing name games, as they are useful for the
students in ensemble building. However, to help myself learn names, it was time to try a different tack.
As a specialist, I will spend the year working regularly with over 200 students. When you add in the fact that I will likely do a unit each with G2 through G5...well, basically I need to know the names of every single one of the 500+ students in the Village School. No sweat.
One of the most impressive professors I have ever had, BP, knew everyone's names on day one. She came to the first class armed with a class list with all of our photos. As a student walked in, she would look at the student's face - then down at her list - then at the student - then at the list. Then BP would look the student in the eye and greet her by name.
To me, there are two main benefits to knowing each child by name. The first is in terms of management. Naturally, the names a teacher learns first are the names he or she has to say a lot - reminders to sit down, raise your hand before speaking, keep your hands to yourself. Being able to call a student's attention by name makes you ten times more effective.
The second (and I would say more important) reason it is important to know every name is because it makes students feel good. When you can greet a child by name, they feel so much more special than if you simply say "hello." Simply adding their name to your warm greeting can go so far in establishing relationships and building community within your classroom and the school as a whole.
So without further ado, here are Ms. H's tips and tricks for learning student names!
1. Many homeroom teachers, especially in the primary years, will have taken a photo of each student for some kind of class project. Ask if they can email those to you with a corresponding list of students' names. (Hint for classroom teachers - if you want your specialists to LOVE you, bring a list of pictures and names to your very first class! Kudos to Mrs. R in G1.) Stare at them. Quiz yourself. Practice, practice, practice.
2. In a similar vein, check out the school's yearbook. Obviously this doesn't help much with Pre-K or with new students, but it can give you a start with those vaguely familiar faces. I find this less helpful than having a list by classroom - knowing which class the student is in can provide you a context that makes it easier to remember them.
3. Sit in and observe the class when possible, particularly during morning meeting or other circle activities. I find that my best memorization happens when I am looking at the child and saying her or his name to myself a few times. However, this only works when I am NOT the lead teacher - with primary teaching, one does not have the luxury to pause the lesson, stare at the child for a few seconds, then move on.
How do YOU learn new names? Have a favourite name game, or another suggestion? Share in the comments, and good luck to us all!
**********
Currently reading: Creating Drama with 4-7 Year Olds by Miles Tandy and Jo Howell
Current high: found the book above as well as a few other great resources in our school library last week! Feeling so excited about my curriculum :)
Current low: this weekend was the wedding of one of my dearest friends (referenced in this post) - so sorry not to be there to celebrate with her
As a specialist, I will spend the year working regularly with over 200 students. When you add in the fact that I will likely do a unit each with G2 through G5...well, basically I need to know the names of every single one of the 500+ students in the Village School. No sweat.
One of the most impressive professors I have ever had, BP, knew everyone's names on day one. She came to the first class armed with a class list with all of our photos. As a student walked in, she would look at the student's face - then down at her list - then at the student - then at the list. Then BP would look the student in the eye and greet her by name.
To me, there are two main benefits to knowing each child by name. The first is in terms of management. Naturally, the names a teacher learns first are the names he or she has to say a lot - reminders to sit down, raise your hand before speaking, keep your hands to yourself. Being able to call a student's attention by name makes you ten times more effective.
The second (and I would say more important) reason it is important to know every name is because it makes students feel good. When you can greet a child by name, they feel so much more special than if you simply say "hello." Simply adding their name to your warm greeting can go so far in establishing relationships and building community within your classroom and the school as a whole.
So without further ado, here are Ms. H's tips and tricks for learning student names!
1. Many homeroom teachers, especially in the primary years, will have taken a photo of each student for some kind of class project. Ask if they can email those to you with a corresponding list of students' names. (Hint for classroom teachers - if you want your specialists to LOVE you, bring a list of pictures and names to your very first class! Kudos to Mrs. R in G1.) Stare at them. Quiz yourself. Practice, practice, practice.
2. In a similar vein, check out the school's yearbook. Obviously this doesn't help much with Pre-K or with new students, but it can give you a start with those vaguely familiar faces. I find this less helpful than having a list by classroom - knowing which class the student is in can provide you a context that makes it easier to remember them.
3. Sit in and observe the class when possible, particularly during morning meeting or other circle activities. I find that my best memorization happens when I am looking at the child and saying her or his name to myself a few times. However, this only works when I am NOT the lead teacher - with primary teaching, one does not have the luxury to pause the lesson, stare at the child for a few seconds, then move on.
How do YOU learn new names? Have a favourite name game, or another suggestion? Share in the comments, and good luck to us all!
**********
Currently reading: Creating Drama with 4-7 Year Olds by Miles Tandy and Jo Howell
Current high: found the book above as well as a few other great resources in our school library last week! Feeling so excited about my curriculum :)
Current low: this weekend was the wedding of one of my dearest friends (referenced in this post) - so sorry not to be there to celebrate with her
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
My third first year of teaching
To begin: yesterday was a long day. Yesterday was a hard day. Yesterday was a day when I needed to go back and read posts from when I was over-the-moon happy and in love with my work and my students.
The day began slowly. My first class was at 11:00, so I spent the morning finishing preparations to my room and lesson plans. I popped into the Pre-K parent coffee to introduce myself and my program. By 10:30, I was done with all my big tasks and unbelievably antsy. I ran all over trying to fill the time with tiny tasks that would make my class arrive faster.
But then it began, and of course, very few things went as planned. I quickly observed in my first class how I should restructure the order of activities before the next group. I considered how I could better manage kindergarteners. I thought of how I could explain the rules more explicitly to prevent misbehaviour. I realized ways I could have changed my plans on the fly to match the students' energy and needs. This will surprise no one who is a teacher: I walked out of my first day feeling like I had fallen flat on my face.
After all this, I was set to have a meeting with my MS/US counterpart and roomie, SW, but it turned into a therapy session instead. I went through all the cliches. "I can't do this." "Why do I even want to be a teacher?" "I quit!" (Okay, clearly I was a tad melodramatic. What can I say? I'm a drama teacher!) She was so, so good in talking me down. It's only day one, she reminded me. Set benchmarks. Things will get better. You'll get used to your role, the kids will get used to you and your routine and your style. "If someone had been watching your lesson," she inquired, "what would they have told you to do differently?" What a great tool for less harsh self-reflection. There were a few tweaks I might have made, but not a whole lot.
In this venting session, I realized something. This is my third time being a first-year teacher. First in my student teaching, my first time taking the lead at all; then last year as an intern, my first full year in the classroom; and now with my first classroom of my own, and a single-subject classroom at that. Should I move on to teach drama at other levels, it will be my first year again; or if I take on my own homeroom, I will be starting from scratch once more. All the hard lessons of being a first-year teacher will be learned again and again. If this restless wanderer ever makes it through 3-5 years in the same position (seems unlikely in the near future!), I hear things start to settle at that point - but even then, the learning is never done.
I was never quite sure if I was an optimist or a pessimist. I knew myself to be, at times, cynical, idealistic, realistic, positive. But what did that boil down to? I wasn't sure.
As I have alluded to, this summer was weird and wonderful in so many ways. It was the healthiest I have felt socially in years - but it was also, at times, trying and challenging. I had two experiences in particular where I came out feeling, for lack of a better word, icky. But then something shifted. With each of those nights, I made a conscious choice the following day to focus on a silver lining. Neither instance was wholly bad; each of them had some golden nugget of validation waiting to be mined out. Now, a month past it, I treasure both of those nights for the compliments and validation of friends rather than the emotional turmoil mixed in.
I decided to make a similar move with my first day as a drama teacher. Was it a perfect day? Nope. Would I even call it a good day? Not likely. But here's what I am choosing to focus on: while it was a steep learning curve, I took it. As each class progressed, I thought of how I could change the lesson, make things better. Even after all three kindergarten classes were done, I contemplated how I could change things like introducing my system for management, which I am getting to try eight more times with my pre-K and G1 classes. I am focusing on my ability to learn from my students and improve myself and my work for them.
It's important for me - and all new teachers - to remind myself to be patient. I am starting a program from scratch; I am teaching something I have never even seen before. I am building the bike as I am riding it. The tires may go flat, the chain may skip, but as long as I keep moving forward, I'll get there eventually. Plus I have great safety gear - an understanding colleague, a supportive admin team, encouraging friends and family. As I just wrote on a post-it on my bulletin board to remind myself - it will get fun again. Ever upward!
***********
Currently reading: Dream Class: How To Transform Any Group Of Students Into The Class You've Always Wanted by Michael Linsin
Current high: while bringing my lunch down to eat in my classroom, several of my now-fourth graders convinced me to come eat with them...just the pick-me-up I needed :) Also my last class of the day went FANTASTICALLY
Current low: you'd think I'd know by now, but I still get surprised by how tired I am the first week back!
The day began slowly. My first class was at 11:00, so I spent the morning finishing preparations to my room and lesson plans. I popped into the Pre-K parent coffee to introduce myself and my program. By 10:30, I was done with all my big tasks and unbelievably antsy. I ran all over trying to fill the time with tiny tasks that would make my class arrive faster.
But then it began, and of course, very few things went as planned. I quickly observed in my first class how I should restructure the order of activities before the next group. I considered how I could better manage kindergarteners. I thought of how I could explain the rules more explicitly to prevent misbehaviour. I realized ways I could have changed my plans on the fly to match the students' energy and needs. This will surprise no one who is a teacher: I walked out of my first day feeling like I had fallen flat on my face.
After all this, I was set to have a meeting with my MS/US counterpart and roomie, SW, but it turned into a therapy session instead. I went through all the cliches. "I can't do this." "Why do I even want to be a teacher?" "I quit!" (Okay, clearly I was a tad melodramatic. What can I say? I'm a drama teacher!) She was so, so good in talking me down. It's only day one, she reminded me. Set benchmarks. Things will get better. You'll get used to your role, the kids will get used to you and your routine and your style. "If someone had been watching your lesson," she inquired, "what would they have told you to do differently?" What a great tool for less harsh self-reflection. There were a few tweaks I might have made, but not a whole lot.
In this venting session, I realized something. This is my third time being a first-year teacher. First in my student teaching, my first time taking the lead at all; then last year as an intern, my first full year in the classroom; and now with my first classroom of my own, and a single-subject classroom at that. Should I move on to teach drama at other levels, it will be my first year again; or if I take on my own homeroom, I will be starting from scratch once more. All the hard lessons of being a first-year teacher will be learned again and again. If this restless wanderer ever makes it through 3-5 years in the same position (seems unlikely in the near future!), I hear things start to settle at that point - but even then, the learning is never done.
I was never quite sure if I was an optimist or a pessimist. I knew myself to be, at times, cynical, idealistic, realistic, positive. But what did that boil down to? I wasn't sure.
As I have alluded to, this summer was weird and wonderful in so many ways. It was the healthiest I have felt socially in years - but it was also, at times, trying and challenging. I had two experiences in particular where I came out feeling, for lack of a better word, icky. But then something shifted. With each of those nights, I made a conscious choice the following day to focus on a silver lining. Neither instance was wholly bad; each of them had some golden nugget of validation waiting to be mined out. Now, a month past it, I treasure both of those nights for the compliments and validation of friends rather than the emotional turmoil mixed in.
I decided to make a similar move with my first day as a drama teacher. Was it a perfect day? Nope. Would I even call it a good day? Not likely. But here's what I am choosing to focus on: while it was a steep learning curve, I took it. As each class progressed, I thought of how I could change the lesson, make things better. Even after all three kindergarten classes were done, I contemplated how I could change things like introducing my system for management, which I am getting to try eight more times with my pre-K and G1 classes. I am focusing on my ability to learn from my students and improve myself and my work for them.
It's important for me - and all new teachers - to remind myself to be patient. I am starting a program from scratch; I am teaching something I have never even seen before. I am building the bike as I am riding it. The tires may go flat, the chain may skip, but as long as I keep moving forward, I'll get there eventually. Plus I have great safety gear - an understanding colleague, a supportive admin team, encouraging friends and family. As I just wrote on a post-it on my bulletin board to remind myself - it will get fun again. Ever upward!
 |
| It will get fun again - to the point I was at in this picture, filled with pure joy and love for my students and work. |
Currently reading: Dream Class: How To Transform Any Group Of Students Into The Class You've Always Wanted by Michael Linsin
Current high: while bringing my lunch down to eat in my classroom, several of my now-fourth graders convinced me to come eat with them...just the pick-me-up I needed :) Also my last class of the day went FANTASTICALLY
Current low: you'd think I'd know by now, but I still get surprised by how tired I am the first week back!
Monday, August 18, 2014
Homecomings/Homegoings
A couple years ago, I began the tradition of "monthly playlists," inspired by my friend RC. Each month I have a fluid playlist, with the date and a title that is apropos to the month. I will add to and remove from it at will from the first to the last day of the month - and then I will leave it. I like to be able to look back to the songs that were meaningful to me at different stages. This of course complements a collection of other more obviously titled playlists I have - Happy, Ch-Ch-Changes, Feminist and Fly, Gym, Folksy Girls, and so on.
In July, I was far too busy to take the time to sit down and cultivate such a playlist. I spent most of my time on my work computer, away from my personal iTunes library, so most of my jams came from the Sara Bareilles station on Pandora or the soundtrack of Heathers: The Musical (ad infinitum). When I first got back to Korea, I sat down to begin crafting one for August. Last year the playlist was entitled "Noble," a play upon the word "august." As I added songs this year, I mused over what the title should be for 2014.
Since my study abroad experience in Jerusalem back in the fall of 2011, I have grappled with the concept of "home." Since moving (semi-)permanently overseas, that struggle has become even more complex. When I first left the United States, my beloved alma mater was still the place that felt most like home - but is a place that will never be my home again. My parents' home is in California, but other than them, not a lot draws me to that place anymore. Going back further, New Hampshire and Maine were both my home at some point, yet while I still feel a sense of kinship with them, I am also far removed from both of those places. I feel an odd sense of home in Boston, where my sister and many of my friends live, although I myself have never lived in the greater Boston area for more than a summer. New Haven, where I was for my summer job, was a place where I felt a sense of belonging unlike I have in years. And now back in Korea - where my address is, where my work is, where most of my life happens.
So when people ask the question, "Where's home?" or "Where are you from?" I have to laugh. What is a simple query for many people presents a deep existential problem for me. There's the easy answer - California. The slightly more complex response - New England and California. And the full monty: Well, I moved from Maine to New Hampshire when I was six, to California when I was thirteen (and that's where my parents still live), went to college in Massachusetts, and now I live in Korea. Whew. Sorry, pal, you didn't know what you were getting yourself into when you were just trying to make small talk.
It's the classic TCK struggle, which I am confronting later in life. I was never a TCK, but as a twenty-something expat, there's a lot of similarities. My first time living overseas, I felt homeless - there was no one place that I belonged. In talking to my sister, though, she brought me to see myself as homeful. No, I do not have an easy and automatic answer to "Where's home?" But there's a richness in having a tapestry to weave in my response, a physical and emotional journey to the person I am constantly in the process of becoming.
Skimming the list of songs I had selected for the month so far, the playlist's title came to me: "Homecomings/Homegoings". Within the summer, and even August alone, I came home so many times - but also left homes behind. I've greeted old friends, forged new relationships, said tearful goodbyes. I feel like I am constantly stepping out of one world and into another. I bloom where I'm planted, so I will almost always fall in love with the world which I find myself a part of. While I am highly future-oriented, I will often dream of a future within that world - my career trajectory in Korea, or what I'll do next summer at the program I worked at. But it's hard to look out at all the worlds in which I am not present and see what I am missing. And so, I am learning, always learning, to find the beauty in my situation. I consider myself lucky beyond all reckoning to have friends and homes across the world.
"Where we love is home. Home that our feet may leave - but not our hearts." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
**********
Currently reading: books upon books of readers' theatre plays
Current high: first drama classes tomorrow!!!
Current low: even after reading three dozen plays, I haven't found one I love for my exploratory!
In July, I was far too busy to take the time to sit down and cultivate such a playlist. I spent most of my time on my work computer, away from my personal iTunes library, so most of my jams came from the Sara Bareilles station on Pandora or the soundtrack of Heathers: The Musical (ad infinitum). When I first got back to Korea, I sat down to begin crafting one for August. Last year the playlist was entitled "Noble," a play upon the word "august." As I added songs this year, I mused over what the title should be for 2014.
Since my study abroad experience in Jerusalem back in the fall of 2011, I have grappled with the concept of "home." Since moving (semi-)permanently overseas, that struggle has become even more complex. When I first left the United States, my beloved alma mater was still the place that felt most like home - but is a place that will never be my home again. My parents' home is in California, but other than them, not a lot draws me to that place anymore. Going back further, New Hampshire and Maine were both my home at some point, yet while I still feel a sense of kinship with them, I am also far removed from both of those places. I feel an odd sense of home in Boston, where my sister and many of my friends live, although I myself have never lived in the greater Boston area for more than a summer. New Haven, where I was for my summer job, was a place where I felt a sense of belonging unlike I have in years. And now back in Korea - where my address is, where my work is, where most of my life happens.
So when people ask the question, "Where's home?" or "Where are you from?" I have to laugh. What is a simple query for many people presents a deep existential problem for me. There's the easy answer - California. The slightly more complex response - New England and California. And the full monty: Well, I moved from Maine to New Hampshire when I was six, to California when I was thirteen (and that's where my parents still live), went to college in Massachusetts, and now I live in Korea. Whew. Sorry, pal, you didn't know what you were getting yourself into when you were just trying to make small talk.
It's the classic TCK struggle, which I am confronting later in life. I was never a TCK, but as a twenty-something expat, there's a lot of similarities. My first time living overseas, I felt homeless - there was no one place that I belonged. In talking to my sister, though, she brought me to see myself as homeful. No, I do not have an easy and automatic answer to "Where's home?" But there's a richness in having a tapestry to weave in my response, a physical and emotional journey to the person I am constantly in the process of becoming.
Skimming the list of songs I had selected for the month so far, the playlist's title came to me: "Homecomings/Homegoings". Within the summer, and even August alone, I came home so many times - but also left homes behind. I've greeted old friends, forged new relationships, said tearful goodbyes. I feel like I am constantly stepping out of one world and into another. I bloom where I'm planted, so I will almost always fall in love with the world which I find myself a part of. While I am highly future-oriented, I will often dream of a future within that world - my career trajectory in Korea, or what I'll do next summer at the program I worked at. But it's hard to look out at all the worlds in which I am not present and see what I am missing. And so, I am learning, always learning, to find the beauty in my situation. I consider myself lucky beyond all reckoning to have friends and homes across the world.
"Where we love is home. Home that our feet may leave - but not our hearts." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
**********
Currently reading: books upon books of readers' theatre plays
Current high: first drama classes tomorrow!!!
Current low: even after reading three dozen plays, I haven't found one I love for my exploratory!
Saturday, August 16, 2014
Full Force
The pace of my life over the last few months has not allowed time for sufficient sleep, much less blogging. Apologies! It's been a heck of a ride...here's what's up.
Given that today is my last day off before school begins, I'm off to make a few trips of "stuff" to and from school, cook lunches and dinners for the week ahead, and treat myself to a mani-pedi with the roomie. For now - I'm back, so watch this space!
**********
Currently reading: The Other Queen by Philippa Gregory
Current high: SW and I went food/apartment shopping yesterday so it's really starting to feel like home
Current low: the school year hasn't even started yet and I think I'm already getting sick!!
- Finished my first official year of teaching (woohoo!)
- Moved my belongings from my intern apartment to my new apartment, shared with my MS/US drama counterpart SW
- Spent a week with my family on Cape Cod, interspersed with catch-ups with friends
- Had the most intense, insane, incredible summer job, which gave me...
- a skewed sense of time
- mild to moderate issues with caffeine dependency
- a renewed sense of confidence and self-assuredness
- dozens of new friends who mean the world to me
- Left my summer job at 5PM Friday, took three planes to Korea, and began work at 8AM Monday
- Unpacked my new apartment (mostly)
- Started settling into my new classroom - although I am still waiting for my purchase order!!
- Planned my first trip of the school year to Cebu with my roommate
Given that today is my last day off before school begins, I'm off to make a few trips of "stuff" to and from school, cook lunches and dinners for the week ahead, and treat myself to a mani-pedi with the roomie. For now - I'm back, so watch this space!
**********
Currently reading: The Other Queen by Philippa Gregory
Current high: SW and I went food/apartment shopping yesterday so it's really starting to feel like home
Current low: the school year hasn't even started yet and I think I'm already getting sick!!
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